The Power Is You

We all have something we are not happy with. Something in our lives we might wish to be different. It might be ourselves. It might be the situation we are in. It doesn’t matter what it is because we all have the power to do something about it. The power that’s in you.

You have the power to change. All it takes is a decision. And then action. Instead of waiting for a change. Choose to be the agent of that change.

It was just over a year ago that the life I had known for almost 10 years ended. It was traumatic. I was devastated. My son was devastated. For weeks all I could do was cry.

I cried almost every night when he was asleep. I cried when I was making the dinner, doing household duties, driving to work. Matter of fact almost every time I was by myself I was crying.

It was a Thursday morning when my wife, my son’s mother, left our shared home. She seemed a bit off. I asked her was she alright. She said she was leaving. Then she left.

Our son called for his breakfast from the living room as I struggled from the pain in my chest, reeled from the heartbreaking news, and just wanted to crumble on the kitchen floor. I was hurt. I was afraid of how it was going to affect our son. I was afraid of what the future now held.

I don’t blame her for anything. Yes, I was saddened that she just gave up and walked away. But I don’t blame her.

Back then, as in many years previous, I was in a deep rut of my own making. I had no spirit, no belief, no energy, no ambition. I was a negative space.

I was spending at least £50 a week on marijuana. I did very little. Oh I went to work and made sure to spend quality time with our son but other than that I just watched tv, movies, surfed the net. Passed time doing nothing of importance.

I was also sick a lot. I had stomach problems, bowel problems. There was nearly always some sort of issue with my health. Physical and mental.

The first while after she left was a very low period of time. If I had to pick a colour for it. It would be black. Not just ordinary black. Vantablack. The one that absorbs practically all visible light. The one that doesn’t really reflect any back into the world.

Somewhere along the way, I can’t pinpoint exactly, but something changed. A determination arose. A strength and power I had never felt previously. A conviction, a belief.

Like a cartoon character from the 80s called He-Man I realised something profound. He used to transform from a mild prince into a strongman with superhuman strength after he held aloft his magic sword and said: “I have the power”. I didn’t need a magic sword. I just felt it within myself. I had the power. The same way you have the power. The power that lies within you. That lies within us all.

The power to be the change in your life.

As I am writing this the amount of change in my life has been astonishing. I am now a person who lives with purpose. I exercise regularly, almost daily. I don’t smoke any marijuana (after a 20 plus year habit), I’ve only been sick once (It was bug going around), I am learning Krav Maga (self-defence), I think I can consider myself a blogger (I’ve written over 40,000 words in 3 months), I actually have goals that I want to achieve (I never did).

The best of it is, I feel this is only the beginning. I’m not absorbing all the light. I’m shining it out there instead.

Now my situation hasn’t really changed. In some ways it is a bit more difficult. I’m now a working single father trying to raise my son with very little outside support. A son who sometimes still struggles with his mother’s departure. My financial situation is fragile.

I know it’s ok though. It will always be ok. Actually, it will be more than ok. I’m going to make sure of that.

Look, the reason why I am telling you all this is to show you that your power to change is a powerful thing. You don’t have to wait for it to come to you. It’s there already just waiting to be called upon.

If it’s something about yourself you are not happy with start taking steps to do something about it. If it’s something that is outside or beyond your control. There is still an answer. If you can’t change what’s without. Change what’s within instead. Change your attitude. Change the way you think about things. Change what you must. It’s all possible.

All it takes is the right belief, the right mindset, then the right actions on that. It won’t always work out, at least how you hoped. You’ll still have days where it feels a bit too much. Days that are tougher than others. There will be constant challenges and difficulties.

In actual fact if you’re doing things right there should be constant challenges and difficulties. Change is possible. I never said it would be easy.

But just remember. Nothing is going to face you that you can’t handle. Just find your strength. Find your courage. Find the power. The power that is you!


34 thoughts on “The Power Is You

  1. That’s wonderful to see that you have risen stronger from the pain. It really is wonderful reading your post. Your strength and determination is admirable. 😊

  2. Hello Chris, hope you’re having a good start of the week! 🙂

    As usually we learn from your experiences, powerful and useful messages are given as a result which is totally inspiring and helpful!
    I agree that we are the power, I agree that change is not easy but it’s the only right and good way especially if we’re having a toxic life, in French there’s a saying I love “quand on veut on peut” or “vouloir c’est pouvoir” means when we want, we can! It’s all inside us, our will is everything “where there’s a will, there’s a way”…
    The most difficult step is to take this decision as you said and hope many will just take it!

    Thank you Chris for sharing! I sent your blog to Matt; I guess he’ll get in touch with you so hopefully it will be helpful for your writing journey
    Have a good day 🙂

    1. Good morning Huguette 😊
      Hasn’t been the start I hoped for. Got a little sad boy in my hands. We’ll be ok though. Love and attention is the order of the day.
      I hope you have had a much better start yourself 🙂
      I like that French saying. So true. It’s all in our own hands. Up to us to create the life we want.
      Auch Huguette that was such a really nice thing to do. I am very touched that you would do such a thing for me 😊 Thank you very very much.
      I hope you have a great day. Much love to you 😊
      P.s. Knowing someone like you brings a smile to my face 😁

      1. I’m sorry your boy is sad, hope the day will get much better and this sadness will go away! I’m sure it will with your attention and care 🙂
        I really didn’t do anything, it was a simple comment I did so no need to thank me but I’m glad I’m able to make you smile 😊
        Wish you a very good luck with such a start and hope the upcoming hours will be much better!
        Much love and support 😊

      2. I appreciate the sympathy. He’ll be ok. Nothing a bit of time won’t fix. Plus his mother was talking to a counsellor last week so that should come around soon enough.
        It actually doesn’t matter what you did…It’s the fact you thought about me that means the most 😊
        I really appreciate your consideration.
        And love and support is always more than welcome. Thank you ☺
        You are such a wonderful and caring person. Keep being you Huguette. There’s no one like you!

      3. I just believe that when you can help or do something good, you should do it, especially when it costs you nothing, and I really appreciate your heartwarming words, it’s truly kind of you! 😊
        Glad his mother is involved as well and surely it’s a part of growing up and he’ll become good as long as he’s having your support and his mother’s.
        Best of luck always Chris 😊

  3. Such a beautiful read ✨ I am inspired through your transformation. Change is one of the scariest things in the world. I too am in the “in between” stages of reprogramming to better myself. I wish you abundant healing and success on your journey 😀

    1. Thank you. I am glad you could find some inspiration from my journey 😊
      Change can be scary. But it’s well worth it.
      I have every faith you will better yourself as you wish. Just keep believing in yourself and you’ll make it happen 🙂
      Thank you for your wishes also. Very kind of you. Best wishes to you also, and good luck!

    1. That’s very kind of you to say such nice words Roshonda 😊 Thank you.
      I hope you are keeping well and wish much success for your good self 🙂

      1. Thank you very much Roshonda. Especially for the best wishes for my son 😊
        That’s very considerate of you.
        Hope you have a great day.

  4. Hello hello hello, i’m so sorry for all, what you have been thru, but i’m glad, that now you are feeling better and you look differently in to the situation☀️, when you think, that you gave all, you have still99%more inside you, always🙏

    1. Good morning Ilona. Thank you for your lovely kind words 😊
      You’re right. There’s always more to give. I hope you have a great day ahead 🤗

  5. And Chris this is the next post you share when you tell your story, school, radio, library are very open to ideas that benefit the community. You are a blogger, sharing it here, now find your power to take it to the next level. Marie xx

    1. Thanks again Marie. It is very kind of you to be so supportive and encouraging. I guess if people are to really benefit I have no choice to take it to the next level and get out there with my message.
      Much love to you and your family, Marie. I hope you are all keeping well.

  6. hi Chris, I am catching up on my fave “bloggers”, so you are one of them!! your last paragraph was inspiring, finding the power, strength and purpose within us to change and make a difference. that can be overwhelming but you have broken it down and i like how you catergorised everything. please know how meaningful your words are to single parents juggling everything all at once and having no one to refer to but ourselves, this type of sharing helps give us focus. one thing I will take away from your piece here is your honest evaluation of what works and what does not for your situation, we are all different and we need to be content with what we have to move forward. much value on your words and thoughts. its not how much we earn or own, our fortune is what we give back to the world and to our families. I think I do the most when I prepare a simple meal everyone can their full share and we chat and share rather than sit in a glam restaurant, pay a huge bill but have no connection with each other. you made me see this, thank you.

    1. Hi Gina. Thank you very much for calling me one of your fave bloggers. That’s high praise indeed 🙏
      Glad you could relate. The struggles of us single parents can only really be understood by each other. Although I have only one child. Having more certainly makes this more challenging. I have so much respect for all the single parents out there. Yes we have the love of our children…but it is hard work.
      I remember a big change came for me after I stopped thinking that I have to do all the chores, have to make all the food, have to clean up, do the laundry, and starting thinking that I get to do that. I get to make my son’s dinners. I get to look after him etc. Made everything so much easier.
      Sometimes the simplest things are the most rewarding.
      I always appreciate your kind words, insight, and views from your own life. Thank you for that.
      Much love to you Gina 😊

      1. see these are the things I appreciate the most from you, giving me a new and totally wonderful perspective. I do enjoy your posts, though I am so slow these days in reading them. you are like me, the simple things matter so much. hugs for the little man and hope he will have a good Easter break with you. Take good care of yourself.

  7. The road to change begins with but a single step. Th only person we can influence to take that step is us. If we are lucky, others will follow. Cheers Chris. Allan

      1. I certainly will Allan. Frankly, I haven’t been doing any real reading of late but I will get around to it again. Best wishes

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