3 Great Ways To Deal With Being Pissed-Off (When Meditation Isn’t Your Thing)

We all know that meditation is the go-to response that people give for helping to deal with negative emotions. But what if meditation isn’t your thing? What do you do then?

Firstly, I understand the principle of meditation. I get why it is so popular. You can’t really deny the positive effects it has. How it can help calm your mind, become more focused, even control your body’s internal regulation.

Of all the personal development books I have read it has been recommended in quite a few. Most personal development leaders would swear by it.

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Here’s the thing. I don’t want to do it. I’m not saying I can’t. I’m saying I won’t. It doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest. I don’t have the patience for it.

Look, I’m Irish. I’ve grown up without any cultural inclination towards it. I’m also quite a fiery and energetic person. Something that has only got worse since I stopped smoking a ton of pot. The whole stilling yourself by just sitting still isn’t in my D.N.A. Plus, in all those pot smoking years I did nothing but sit still most of the time. I’ve a lot of movement to make up for.

So what can someone like me do? Someone who needs to be doing something?

Take yesterday for example. I woke up in a grumpy, pissed-off, mood. I had a headache that wouldn’t abate for hours. Work was noisy, and a struggle, so that only made things a bit worse. When I got home I couldn’t get any time to do anything for myself. Due to being a single parent I was constantly getting called for one thing or the other. That was also making me a bit frustrated which in turn was making me a bit angry.

My mind was scattered. All over the place. I couldn’t even come up with any ideas for this blog. Not one. I bubbled with frustration and annoyance. Wished for some ‘alone’ time more than anything and when I couldn’t get it my annoyance only magnified. By this time I was pissed-off with a capital P.

I would imagine that such a time would have required meditation. At the same time there was no way I would’ve been able to still my mind or even sit still to do such a thing. When you’re pissed-off would you want to?

Fast forward to bedtime. To the time where I couldn’t sleep because my mind was brimming with ideas. Where I was feeling happy and chilled out again. Where I was more full of life than I had been all day.

So what changed? It was a combination of 3 things actually. They each did their little bit in settling my mind. Getting me back to feeling like ‘me’ again. These 3 things aren’t in any particular order. They’re just 3 things that worked for me. They might work for you too.

  1. Exercise
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The benefits of working up a sweat are great. I’m not an expert in this field but I know enough about those feel-good endorphins it releases. When that exercise also includes hitting things I think it gives it that little bit more in the way of releasing frustration. Thankfully, I have a little gym in my shed which means it’s easy for me to get in there and get going. How much you need to do you can gauge for yourself although I do think it’s best to tire yourself out as much as possible.

2. Getting to Vent

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Oh this is a good one. I have an online friend. Someone who I’ve only known a few months and have never met but who I consider as great a friend as those I have in my life that I have known for years. This person let me say how I was feeling without any judgement. There was no ‘you shouldn’t be feeling like that’ or ‘you should be thankful for what you have’. She was just there. Saying it was ok to complain. To just let it out. The only thing she offered was a kind ear and support. Seriously, sometimes that’s exactly what you need. If you don’t have someone like that in your life. Go find them.

3. Deciding to say f**k it!

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Ok, it’s like this. I put a lot of pressure on myself. There are lots of reasons why really but the main one is that I’ve wasted so many years being ‘wasted’ and not doing very much. As a result I like to be as productive as possible in my home and work life. I like to push on and keep pushing on. Taking time off from my pursuits is a luxury I can’t afford.

Yesterday however, I’m glad I did. Sometimes it’s exactly what you need to do. I don’t really watch tv anymore. I havent seen a movie in at least a year. I knew there was a new season of a programme my son and I had watched and enjoyed last year shortly after his mum left that had helped us through some dark days.

So I put my phone away. Sat on the sofa beside him. And put it on. (It was Cobra-Kai. It’s awesome. If you’ve ever watched the original Karate Kid you’ll love it).

I stopped worrying about wasting time. Stopped thinking of all the things I have to do and just let the outside world stay where it was. We just sat there enjoying the show, having a laugh, and talking about the characters that annoyed us and the ones we liked.

I must say that feeling of letting go, of not caring about what I have to do, was better than anything I personally would have got from meditation.

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As a result of all those things yesterday, here I am today. Ready to go. Relaxed, but full of energy. Brimming with ideas and prepared for all the things I need to do to improve my son and I’s lives.

The world that I wanted to shut myself off from has been welcomed back in. There isn’t a pissed-off bone in my body. I’m raring to go. Eager to see what the day will bring. I hope these things help you as much as they did me.


P.s. Have you any other ways of dealing with being pissed-off? Are you someone who doesn’t feel compelled to try meditation? What are your coping mechanisms?


42 thoughts on “3 Great Ways To Deal With Being Pissed-Off (When Meditation Isn’t Your Thing)

  1. I recall sitting in a dentist chair way back in 1976 and looking up, saw a ceiling poster that read…Change Your Thoughts and You will Change Your World. I am a big believer in that. Sometimes, we get so lost in our world/problems, we build them up to be more than they are and they then own us. I like to take a step back and see it through different eyes, read a book, take a hike, play a game, meet a friend for coffee or simply say F It. Allan

    1. Great dentist! And such a true sentiment. I’m a believer of that myself.
      We do get lost in our own problems sometimes and they start consuming us. Times like that we need to shift out perspective. Your ways are as good as any.
      Appreciate your insight Allan. Best wishes to you and yours.

  2. Thank you Chris for sharing this important and inspiring post!
    First let me agree with you on how meditation is good as proven worldwide and also how much I’m unable to do it and didn’t even try (probably I will if I did tried) but seems I don’t want to until now so the tips you shared are great , to the exercise let me add boxing and imagining some faces while hitting πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Thank you for these lovely words glad I could be that helpful! I didn’t do anything though so appreciate your great appreciation a lot 😊
    No harm from complaining and venting until the person feels better that’s for sure😊
    And fuck it indeed! Relax or sleep and forget about the world for some time always helps watching your favorite show is a great idea , listening to cheerful music and if you have the privilege to sit in the nature or drive in the middle of nature then it helps too πŸ‘
    Thank you for this post and remember this post came from yesterday’s state of mind so whatever you feel you can always write great posts πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ˜Š
    Glad your day is better and productive
    Much love and support 😊❀️

    1. Thanks Huguette. Glad you like it 😊
      Meditation just isn’t my style.
      About hitting things it funny you say that because when I’m kicking the crap out of some things and going wild my sensei usually asks who I thought they were. Actually he normally thinks it’s my ex-wife hahaha
      Who said I was talking about you?! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ It was someone else πŸ€₯ haha
      Seriously though. You actually helped a lot. Thank you πŸ™πŸ˜Š
      Haha yeah, I pussied out with just writing it the proper way. Still debating that one haha
      All good suggestions too. I think an update is in order.
      I feel better writing about something when I feel the passion in me. Guess yesterday wasn’t too bad a day after all.
      Oh yes. Spent time fixing up some older posts too. Gotta sort them out with more pics and stuff.
      Hope you’ve been enjoying your day off.
      Much love always Huguette 😊❀

      1. Hahaha the honest emoji again! Glad you weren’t then πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
        Lot of rage while kicking the crap out of some things it seems, but always helps πŸ˜‚
        The passion is not controllable, you feel it, you write you so don’t stress when you don’t 😊
        Let me know which posts you edited so I can check them, it’s good to improve always πŸ‘
        My day is great thank you, will try to have some time to post, otherwise won’t be an issue
        Have a great time and much love 😊❀

      2. Haha very honest indeed 😁
        Well better things than people haha although you might not agree πŸ˜‚
        I love writing with passion. It’s the truest sort. Really comes across in your writing too.
        Well If you want. It was the dwelling with depression one. And one I changed to When things get on top of you. I don’t mind if you don’t have the time πŸ‘
        Glad you had a great day 😊 You deserve too.
        Hope your night is going well too. Much love Huguette 😊❀

      3. πŸ˜‚ yes people are better!
        Sure writing with passion is the best and the more authentic I guess
        Sure will check them don’t worry about time 😊
        Have a good night and hope you’ll have a great weekend 😊❀️

      4. Haha Savage πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
        Oh I think it is. Just difficult to have that with every post.
        Well thanks for that. Me and A had another Cobra Kai session tonight. Can’t wait for my class tomorrow to start kicking ass haha
        Goodnight Huguette. Hope your weekend is great too 😊❀

      5. Yes savage indeed πŸ˜‚ I scare me sometimes
        Great! Imagine some faces πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
        Good night and enjoy all your days 😊❀️

      6. Hahaha scaring yourself takes it to a whole other level of badass 🀘
        Haha faces will be imagined…And smashed. Going to use your emoji for that one 😌 haha
        Likewise Huguette. It’s always a joy.

      7. 😌😌😌
        Good use of my emoji I guess πŸ˜‚
        Until tomorrow I guess
        Have a good night 😊❀️

      8. Haha it’s the I’m sweet but deadly emoji. Nice…until I rip your face off 😁
        All being well I hope so.
        Goodnight Huguette 😊❀

      9. Good morning Huguette 😁
        Hope you’re having a good start to the day.
        Seems it’s our turn for the crap weather. Really windy and rainy here. No childminder to get to my class either. Oh well.
        Hope you’re getting to do what you want today.
        Much love to you 😊❀

      10. Guess it’s good evening now 😊 sorry was away today, hope you had a great day despite this windy and rainy weather!
        It was a good day out but certainly not good for blogging πŸ™‚
        Take care and much love to you as well 😊❀

      11. Haha I guess it is 😊
        No need to be sorry. Glad you had a good day away 😁 Can’t be blogging all the time (much as we’d like to πŸ˜„) If you started blogging when out you’d turn into one of those annoying people on their phones all the time. Can’t be having that haha
        We were housebound today. Had a bit of family drama. A and I are good though.
        You take care too Huguette. Much love to you 😊❀

      12. Yes certainly, and anyway I’m not that person on my phone the entire time gladly! 😊
        Sorry to hear about the family drama, hope it wasn’t serious though!
        Reading your new post, great to see you found time for a new post 😊 Bravo

      13. Glad to hear that too 😊
        Nothing serious. Just some upset. Appreciate the concern.
        Ah, the post is a development of a little video I did ages ago haha Cheated a bit on that one.
        Thank you though πŸ™
        Away to the other comment 😊❀

      14. Hope things will get smoother then πŸ‘πŸ˜Š
        It’s not cheating, these are all ideas and thoughts πŸ‘
        Wish you a good night and hope tomorrow will be a good day and your visit will smoothly 😊❀️

      15. Thank you for your hope Huguette 😊
        A is good so I’m good. Just someone else that has to work out their issues. Hate to be cold but it’s not my problem. And I can’t have that problem affecting A. Think I’ll leave it at that. As you say long story.
        Thanks for the goodnight. Am dreading the long drive and leaving A for the day. Can’t wait to see my family but dreading it at the same time if that makes sense haha
        Hope you have a good day tomorrow also. Goodnight and sweet dreams 😊❀

      16. Yes I can understand what you mean πŸ‘ but edit your comment to amend A name πŸ™„
        Long story indeed, other issues and problems that affect our life
        Yes I still remember the double feelings of this visit so hope it will eventually be better than expected 😊❀️

      17. Oh shit. I didn’t even realise I did that. Thanks Huguette 😲
        Yeah, those issues are normally the most complicated unfortunately πŸ™„
        Here’s to hoping πŸ₯‚
        Much love always😊❀
        You on a late night again πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
        Sleep is for the weak haha

      18. Good morning and hope you’ll have a great day 😊
        I know you didn’t, you were a bit taken by the subject that is upsetting you
        Sleep is for the weak πŸ˜‚ but you wake up so weak when you don’t hahah
        Much love and support ❀️😊

      19. I’m a bit late for this one haha
        Only seeing comments now but I appreciate the sentiment 😊
        I was. But thanks for pointing it out all the same πŸ‘
        Haha that’s true. Learned that lesson this morning. Don’t think I woke up properly until I was halfway to my hometown. Oh you would have loved it. Hardly any traffic. Got to drive at my own speed most of the way. (I don’t go over 70mph. My wee car couldn’t take it. Probably shake itself to pieces haha). Would’ve been ideal for a speed demon like yourself πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
        Hope you are keeping well today.
        Much love Huguette 😊❀

      20. Oh I would certainly loved the road then 😊 I can imagine you car going into pieces like Tom & Jerry funny car scene πŸ˜‚ you can’t let this happen, 70 miles is not bad and the car is very important, mine isn’t better actually, it embarrasses me sometimes haha
        Yes the impact of bad sleep always appears and strikes πŸ˜•
        Checking another comment 😊

      21. Haha You’re right with your imagination πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I was pushing the wee thing to it’s limits. Bit of a boneshaking journey haha
        It’s ok though. I had the annual car test a few weeks back. It failed. Spent a fortune getting it fixed. Then it passed. Don’t think it will let me down for a while anyway.
        Nothing embarrassing about any car. Way I look at it is that if it gets you to where you need to go that’s good enough.
        Think there’s a comment left..😊❀

      22. It is meant of transportation indeed! We always laugh when we remember many moments in relatives cars, and how we managed to arrive and so, my car is good but I never care there was a day where I had back and legs pain from using public transportation and taxis…I respect all people
        Another comment 😊

      23. Shit. Any car is better than that! Arriving anywhere without any pain always has to be a bonus.
        Although I’d love to see you driving a fast car just to see how fast you would actually drive haha
        I imagine there would be a lot of g-force involved haha
        I’ll get other comments later. Currently ‘working’ πŸ˜‚
        Hope your day is going well 😊
        Much love 😊❀

      24. Oh yes indeed it is a bonus 😊
        I never drove a decent car so I don’t know yet how crazy I can get 😁
        Have a great day and will catch you later
        Much love to you 😊❀️

      25. Haha We need to get you on a racetrack asap You’ll probably still be cursing the slow drivers for only doing 100mph haha
        Much love to you 😊❀

      26. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ oh yes I will hahahah
        It’s a great way to die I guess πŸ€“ (glad my mother doesn’t read this haha)

  3. good one this!! firstly i too don’t do meditation, to me meditating is like distancing yourself from a problem, no solution just putting it in nap mode! some people are going to hate me for saying this! secondly…i am like you, ask me to sit still and i am thinking am I being punished!! i would do all the above except #2 – i learnt a painful lesson about sharing and venting to an online friend, its a long sad story so not going to get into it. but yes to exercise and spending time with the kid, sometimes I combine both, we walk together or run together. when i am pissed off I listen to really loud music and deep clean! writing also helps, I have a clearer head after i put it all down in words. hope you are feeling better and thank you for sharing these valuable tools!

    1. Aww Gina. I’m sorry to hear you had an unfortunate experience online. To be fair they can’t have been much of a friend if they taught you a painful lesson.
      Oh I’m not a fan of it either and I like that you’re just telling it as it is. I get the whole just sitting still thing. It makes me uncomfortable just thinking about it. Ok if you’re reading or something. But just sitting there breathing. That would drive me crazy haha
      And listening to loud music and deep cleaning. That’s a good one. I’m a fan of the cleaning also. Good therapy.
      And writing of course. Such a great release. Really helps let things go.
      Thanks for your insight on this one Gina. Really enjoyed your thoughts on this.
      Best wishes to you and your family 😊

      1. well you’d be surprised how the lessons help us know who are real friends are, anyway i don’t like to judge and condemn, they probably had issues of their own that had nothing to do with me, I alone am responsible for the quality of my life. it is not fair to lay that expectation on anyone else.

        yeah i am a lot like you, i like doing things, tangible things, gardening was another avenue to sort my head out, when i had a larger plot of land in the past. working with our hands, much like writing gives us a sense of purpose and accomplishment.

        my pleasure if anything i said made even the littlelest of sense.

        have a smashing Sunday!!

      2. Hi Gina. I hope you and your family are keeping well. It seems I missed a few comments on here. Really sorry about that. Much apologies.
        I agree that we are responsible for the quality of our lives but we must also be able to speak freely. Especially to those we would consider as friends.
        I feel there is more benefit in doing things than just sitting still. Like gardening and writing as you have said.
        You always make sense to me Gina and I value your insights and wisdom.
        Much love to you and yours.

  4. Oh no, meditation is a no for me too…I think I just cannot do it…but letting it go and not caring about what I have to do or that I feel I’m wasting my time is well worth it…and it works 😊

    1. Hi Ribana. Ah a kindred spirit haha
      I can’t even listen to people talking about meditation. No interest whatsoever.
      Whatever else works is great. Glad you know what works for you 😊

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